Live for Love

What is life all about? Obviously I don't know, but I really doubt someone will give me a good answer anyways. I say live for love, love your family, love your neighbor (unless he's a completely rude asshole), love your friends, love your enemies for they are what gives us excitement in life. Live for love, love your life. I don't know what the heck i'm saying because i don't believe it myself.

Recently, I've been able to push aside all my anger and sadness because my friends were there for me. This is a short blog entry because there's nothing that could be said. =[ That's all (;

Freaking OUT!

Oh my goodness, any kids out there freaking out about college?

I know that this was going to happen but I didn't expect it so soon or late? I'm not sure anymore...College is the big word for me. I sat around, slacked off, cut class, talked back to teachers, joked around about my work...and now it's come back to burn me. I knew that my GPA counted for all four years and everything, yet, I still allowed myself to be so lazy and uncaring. I'm so worried now, like more worried then those who are waiting for their acceptance letters.

May 2nd is the day that I take my first SAT test, I've had little prep. and also slacked off all around. I am PRAYING for my score to be over 1600 or else I may cry like a rainy day. Right now, I'm going to get rid of all the junk I don't need...like clothes and such. REALLY! if anyone wants ANYTHING of mine just offer me more then 5 dollars? HAHAHA...except my bags and jackets(;

okay so college college college. All i know is that i'm definitely going to apply for SUNY Buffalo, SUNY Albany, St Johns, SUNY Stonybrook, CUNY Baruch, Long Island U, Barnard (?),Brooklyn College.

GOOD LUCK FOR PEOPLE TAKING SATS! I don't know how to end this again..let me give a nice song to all the '09 Grads!

My Past Month

Wow, I notice how my blogs seemed to get really off topic.

Relationship...is what two people share, right?
A month ago my relationship with someone I cared about ended, that relationship only lasted a year but I felt really depressed. That led to me skipping class and screwing myself over. I got into so much trouble, I thought of hanging myself too...I know how scary that sounds but that's the full truth.

Now, I'm healing myself with the help of my friends. I really want to thank Robert, Tat, Jackson, Kristy, Shirley(s), Kevin, Nicole, and Ivan(!) too. There's obviously more people but these people talked to me about my problems during that month. I realized how much my life will change within one year, so I'm going to focus to the sake of my life. I know, I sound really stupid because I'm explaining the situation where it's like I'm blaming my relationship with that one guy. To be honest, he deserves my thanks too. If I didn't feel the way I did when I was with him, I wouldn't realize all of these things. Thank you.

another thing, I was talking to Ivan and we were discussing preferences of the person we would want to be with. I don't know if I was asking for too much but I said

I expect him to:

• care if I get hurt


• to be confident, but not to a point where he's cocky.


• protective of me


• like me as more than just a friend, BUT no matter what, he can still be a friend.


• be able to talk about his problems, and listen to mine.


• love his family, and care for his friends.


• have common sense and be responsible for his actions


• realize that playing around with my feelings is wrong.

Is it too much to ask for? Either way, i know what i want now and I'm not going to stray towards the wrong way anymore. To finish this blog..(short blog again!)

Here's a pretty common song, but i like it:
Dead and Gone:

Dead and gone - Justin Timberlake